Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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