I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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