i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
