I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
you had me at cake vodka
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
