I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
