found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
