I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
