In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
