I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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