My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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