Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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