All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
