she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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