I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
