Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
