Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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