forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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