You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Life is so much better after having sex.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
