just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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