Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize