I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
