ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize