Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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