I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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