She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
