That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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