where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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