3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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