Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Randomize
