i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
