Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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