I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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