If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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