I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
