.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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