it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
