I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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