Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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