My brain says no but my pants say off.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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