just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
