Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
