Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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