i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Randomize
