at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
