so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize