listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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