We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
