I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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