woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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