well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
