But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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