So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
